What Working Moms Actually Need... And It’s Not Less
When I came back from maternity leave, the advice poured in.
Some people told me I was back too soon. Others suggested I take a few years off “you’ll never get this time back,” they said.
Many encouraged me to ease off the gas, scale back my ambitions, and settle into a slower season.
All of it was (mostly) well-intentioned. But underneath the surface was a quiet, persistent message:
Now that you’re a mom, you should want less. Do less. Be less.
But what if that’s exactly the problem?
What if working mothers aren’t overwhelmed because we’re doing too much? What if we’re overwhelmed because we’re navigating systems that weren’t built to support us at all.
We don’t need less.
We need something entirely different.
We’re Not Asking to Be Rescued.
We’re Asking to Be Seen.
Most working moms I know aren’t looking for shortcuts.
We’re not asking for sympathy.
We’re asking for a world that sees our full selves and supports us like we belong here.
While this post is for working moms, many working parents will recognize the weight: the emotional load, the logistical juggling, the silent recalibration of ambition.
Before we get to what would actually help, let’s talk about what hasn’t.
🚫 The Advice That Sounds Supportive, But Isn’t
1️⃣ “Just Get More Organized.”
As if a better calendar could fix structural imbalance. Organization helps but it doesn’t erase the mental load or the cultural double standards we carry.
2️⃣ “Lower Your Standards.”
This is a subtle invitation to burn out. We don’t need to expect less from ourselves we need systems that expect more from the environments we work in.
3️⃣ “Take a Step Back for Now.”
That temporary pause? It often becomes permanent. Let’s stop treating motherhood as a career detour and start treating it as part of the leadership journey.
4️⃣ “Outsource More.”
Sure, help matters. But the solution isn’t just logistical it’s emotional, cultural, and systemic. You can’t delegate the pressure.
5️⃣ “Don’t Talk About Your Kids at Work.”
Motherhood doesn’t make us less professional it often makes us better leaders. More empathetic. More efficient. More human. And for working parents, being whole at work shouldn't be radical it should be normal.
So What Do We Actually Need?
Here’s what would truly move the needle—for working mothers, and for any modern workplace:
✅ Outcomes Over Optics
Judge performance by impact—not hours logged or faces on screens. Flexibility isn’t a favor. It’s a foundation for high performance.
✅ A Village, Not a Venn Diagram
We need support systems—not more life hacks. Help that’s real, accessible, and shared. Because no one—mother or father—should have to do two full-time jobs alone.
✅ Leadership That’s Human
We need leaders who model boundaries, take family leave, and normalize life outside of work. Not superheroes—humans.
✅ Space to Redefine Ambition
Ambition looks different in different seasons. Some days it’s boardrooms, other days it’s bedtime stories. Both matter. Both count.
✅ Truth Over Performative Resilience
We’re not looking for applause. We’re looking for honesty. Fewer polished narratives. More real talk. Less pretending it’s all “fine.”
Here’s the Truth:
Working moms don’t need to be “fixed.”
We need systems, structures, and support that recognize what we carry—and rise to meet us.
We’re not the problem.
But too often, we’re asked to be the solution.
And while this conversation starts with moms, it doesn’t end there.
Because when workplaces are built to support caregivers, everyone benefits.
Your Turn
Whether you’re a friend, partner, colleague, manager, or company—ask a working mom what real support would look like.
Then listen.
And act.
Because building a future that works for working moms?
Isn’t just good for mothers. It’s good for everyone.